I am a wife, a mother, an advocate, a helper, a speaker, a friend, a volunteer, a caregiver, and other titles which do not come with a full benefit package, and all mean I spend a lot of my days and time doing for others.
I will continue to do all those things. It is what I am made of.
Lately however, I find I am feeling somewhat resentful of time slipping away and the feeling that I am not able to do the things I want to do and the things I need to do for me. Sometimes I even want to have a block of time to do nothing. I never get that.
I have tried going on strike but I am a cog in a lot of wheels- some that come to a complete halt in my absence.
I do not mean this is a vain way only that there are people in need who need me. I find my brain does not shut off and as a result I do not rest even if I do sleep.
Do you ever feel starved for time to yourself? Some days I am not able to breathe a sigh of being "done" until 19 hours have passed by.
I know, I know...I just blogged about a vacation not long ago. But you mothers will agree that sometimes a vacation can be tougher than staying home and you need a vacation from vacation. I always say that I wish I could just get in a car with that "and away we go" attitude. There is so much little detail stuff, endless in fact, that needs to go into packing 5 people into a small car to travel almost 30 hours and be away for a week. Then there is the getting caught back up when you return. Whoa! That is even worse. I am still trying to get caught up.
I think I am just TIRED!!